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http://www.theonion.com/content/news_br … =a-section

Girlfriend Loves Spending 'Alone Time' With You

SAGINAW, MI—According to your girlfriend, your request for some "alone time" this afternoon sounds fantastic, and she'd love nothing more than to do that with you. "We could go to the farmers market, or even just read in the park together," your girlfriend said. "Or we could go on a long walk by ourselves. This is great—we haven't had any alone time in months." Sources close to your girlfriend said she has already contacted two other couples she knows, to see if they're free to do a small alone-time thing around 8 p.m.